Category: resilience

Like peas in a pod…or not

Joey Jones2 Comments

Which aspects do you think makes a person unique?

We all agree, I reckon that it’s our genetic make-up, our DNA, that is the mother of our uniqueness?

After that, it’s pretty much the wildwest-I was going to say where do we start? But I guess the beginning is a good place as any.

We were created by and from two souls who brought a whole bunch of baggage to the table.

Our upbringing and could on the surface be similar to a sibling, but there will be differences from the off. And dont forget, identical twins will have different fingerprints.

The conditioning that is absorbed and that rejected. An inane sense of self may begin quite young. There again, maybe sometimes that never develops.

Does a child feel supported, guided, safe, and loved? Is it well fed and nourished in all ways every single child should? Everything that happens around them will affect their way of looking at the world. Or do they look the other way in denial, shutting down their developing brains for safe keeping?

Personal life experiences, triumphs, failures,challenges,perspectives, perceptions, values, beliefs, morals, passions, natural abilities, goals,authenticity, and  choice? It all has an effect.

Our ability or inability to express ourselves with so many varying communication styles. Or unable to at all, causing innumerable issues.

Where does self-reliance and strength of character become a thing?

When/how is an honest or dishonest person formed?

What makes a human being kind, open, friendly, and compassionate?

Why are some folk cold, hard, remote?

What makes us unique is a topic worthy of a thesis. Methinks

How complex.

You fall down, you get up

Joey JonesLeave a comment

How has a failure, or apparent failure, set you up for later success?

“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it”

Maya Angelou ( 1928~2014)

Becoming who I always was

Joey Jones11 Comments

Describe the most ambitious DIY project you’ve ever taken on.

My biggest DIY project has never involved a hammer, a paintbrush, or a YouTube tutorial. 
It has been me, growing up without guidance, without a blueprint, without the scaffolding of family or social support. I built myself from whatever scraps of stability I could find. I learned by doing, by failing, by getting back up, and by trusting that forward was the only direction available.

For years, I didn’t see it as a project at all. It was just survival. But now, in later life, I can finally step back far enough to see the whole picture: the joins, the seams, the improvisations, the quiet triumphs. As Soren Kierkegaard wrote, “Life is understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.” Only now do I understand the truth of that.

David Bowie said the best part of getting older is that you become who you always were. 
He was right. I didn’t arrive here by accident. I carved my way here. And now, with the noise behind me, I can finally see the shape of the woman I’ve been building in the dark for decades: steady, unborrowed, unmistakably myself. Not new. Just finally visible.

This DIY project is ongoing. There are still loose ends and unfinished corners, and there always will be. But the structure holds. I hold. And what stands today is a life built from resilience, instinct, and a kind of courage I had to teach myself one day at a time. 
It turns out the bravest thing I ever built was myself.

Author’s Note 
Written in recognition of the woman I became, and the long road it took to meet her.