If you could be someone else for a day, who would you be, and why?
Being an Olympian on the day she picks up gold for fencing
En garde
Becoming who I always was
Describe the most ambitious DIY project you’ve ever taken on.
My biggest DIY project has never involved a hammer, a paintbrush, or a YouTube tutorial.
It has been me, growing up without guidance, without a blueprint, without the scaffolding of family or social support. I built myself from whatever scraps of stability I could find. I learned by doing, by failing, by getting back up, and by trusting that forward was the only direction available.
For years, I didn’t see it as a project at all. It was just survival. But now, in later life, I can finally step back far enough to see the whole picture: the joins, the seams, the improvisations, the quiet triumphs. As Soren Kierkegaard wrote, “Life is understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.” Only now do I understand the truth of that.
David Bowie said the best part of getting older is that you become who you always were.
He was right. I didn’t arrive here by accident. I carved my way here. And now, with the noise behind me, I can finally see the shape of the woman I’ve been building in the dark for decades: steady, unborrowed, unmistakably myself. Not new. Just finally visible.
This DIY project is ongoing. There are still loose ends and unfinished corners, and there always will be. But the structure holds. I hold. And what stands today is a life built from resilience, instinct, and a kind of courage I had to teach myself one day at a time.
It turns out the bravest thing I ever built was myself.
Author’s Note
Written in recognition of the woman I became, and the long road it took to meet her.
Two words
If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?
Banning these words won’t make it go away.. but when I hear them, I fear the implications for all involved
Mass Redundancy
Rudyard Kipling has the words
What is the biggest challenge you will face in the next six months?
The Power of the Dog
There is sorrow enough in the natural way
From men and women to fill our day;
And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
Why do we always arrange for more?
Brothers and Sisters, I bid you beware
Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
Buy a pup and your money will buy
Love unflinching that cannot lie—
Perfect passion and worship fed
By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
Nevertheless it is hardly fair
To risk your heart for a dog to tear.
When the fourteen years which Nature permits
Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,
And the vet’s unspoken prescription runs
To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
Then you will find—it’s your own affair—
But… you’ve given your heart to a dog to tear.
When the body that lived at your single will,
With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!).
When the spirit that answered your every mood
Is gone—wherever it goes—for good,
You will discover how much you care,
And will give your heart to a dog to tear.
We’ve sorrow enough in the natural way,
When it comes to burying Christian clay.
Our loves are not given, but only lent,
At compound interest of cent per cent.
Though it is not always the case, I believe,
That the longer we’ve kept ’em, the more do we grieve:
For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
A short-time loan is as bad as a long—
So why in—Heaven (before we are there)
Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?
By Rudyard Kipling ( 1865~1936)
Growing Up in Different Worlds
What advice would you give to your teenage self?
Every generation grows up in a different world, shaped by its own noise and illusions. Today’s young live through screens, influencers, and “reality” that isn’t real, and I worry they’re losing touch with the quiet truths of nature. But my generation had its own distortions too.
So the advice I’d give my younger self, and them, is simple: hold on to what’s real, stay curious, trust your own eyes more than the world’s noise, and pay attention to the quiet things because they’re the ones that last. In the end, the task never changes. Keep your focus on what’s real, not what’s loud.
In the words of Derek Walcott
Love After Love
The time will come
when, with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,
and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread, Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you
all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf
the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.
Derek Walcott ( 1930~2017)
The Dog, the Door, and the Grain of Things
What bores you?
Patch asks to go out, so I open the door. He pauses on the threshold, reading the air like it’s a message meant only for him. He steps out, then reappears moments later, nose pressed to the French window, fogging the glass with fresh nose‑art. I open the door again; he doesn’t come in. He just stands there, undecided, as if the threshold itself is the point. When I step outside to usher him in, he runs away. This is where I recognise boredom, not mine, his. I try to be the best Mom, but he would test the patience of a saint.
And yet boredom requires a blankness I don’t possess. Even in these tiny domestic loops, the world offers micro‑textures, the shift in light, the slant of a thought, the way Patch listens to something older than sound. These subtleties unfurl easily for me. They keep the moment textured and full. With so much quiet detail to inhabit, boredom has nowhere to settle.
It’s impossible to choose just one
What is your favourite drink?
There are four drinks I could live on forever. All are so delicious, and each holds memories.
Coconut water, watermelon juice, Turkish coffee, and chai.
The People Who Steady A Room
Who are your favorite people to be around?
Generosity of spirit has so many facets: patience, kindness, steadiness, the ability to see others clearly without judgement. I could write about all of them, but today I’m choosing just one or two that feel especially true to me.
I love people who move through the world with a sense of emotional abundance, as if kindness isn’t something they’ll run out of, but something that grows the more they use it.
These are the people who steady a room simply by being in it.
Who leave others feeling a little more seen, a little more human.
Who remind me that goodness doesn’t need an audience.
2. Footwear? You ask us girls about shoes?
Tell us about your favorite pair of shoes, and where they’ve taken you.
Feb 2026. Below is the reply to the DP I wrote a year ago. Not long after, I had begun blogging again. I’m tempted to rewrite the whole thing. But no. I’ll leave it be.
Feb 2025. Currently, I spend most of my time in wellies. It’s February, in England and I walk my dog a lot in the muddiest of areas. My choice, I know.
But asking a female about favourite footwear? With any luck, we’ve all had quite a few pairs that have made us happy. Yes, I can see I’ve generalised there, and yes, there are going to be lots of ladies that have had the one special pair, and I look forward to reading about them.
Cowboy boots, desert boots, moccasin boots, Converse, Birkies, platforms, killer heels, bejewelled sandals, clogs, the list goes on.
I don’t buy leather anymore, but I did once upon a time have the most beautiful chestnut coloured sandals that encased my foot. It’s impossible to describe, really but memorable. They took me to Saudi Arabia- and thinking about that, I imagine I gave up my beloved biker boots at that same time. Wouldn’t be needing those in the desert.
IN THE BOOMER PIGEON HOLE? 
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